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A Busy Mom's Letter to Santa

Hey Santa! Blow some of that Christmas magic over here!

Dear Santa,

I hope things are going well for you and Mrs. Claus and the elves. I hear the North Pole is experiencing a more-or-less permanent warm spell these days. Hope you’re enjoying the nice weather. Have you had a chance to go swimming?

I have been a very good girl this year. In the midst of work deadlines, colds and flus, budgetary constraints, and the odd family emergency, I’ve managed to keep the kids well fed and get them to school on time most days. Not to mention soccer practice, dance lessons, slumber parties, summer camps, scout meetings, bake sales, school plays, and parent-teacher meetings. I’ve kissed all the boo-boos, cleaned up all the spills, and I believe I’ve read more than the requisite number of bedtime stories. It would really help if I could get an eighth day in my week. Do you think you could swing that? We could call it “Santaday”.

I can’t say my me-time hasn’t suffered this year. I can’t remember the last time I took a bubble bath, or read an entire novel in less than three months’ time. And date-nights with Mark, which we instituted as part of our New Years’ resolutions, lasted only through the third week of January. But I am grateful for my family and happy (for the most part) with my career. If it’s not too much to ask, I’d be thrilled if you could somehow arrange to let Bob in marketing leave the firm. He is such a boor. He shoots down all of my ideas and never allots my department the funding we need to complete our projects. Plus he smells like sardines. His departure from the company doesn’t have to be due to anything horrible. Maybe you could just let him find a better position with another firm. Far, far away. Are there any openings in marketing at the North Pole?

I have been nice, for the most part. I was very gracious to my mother-in-law when she spent her entire visit in July criticizing my cleaning and cooking skills. I tried so hard to refrain from yelling all those times Becky dragged all of her toys out into the living room and refused to clean them up. Oh, and when Greg’s teacher called me to say that Greg had not done any of his homework in two weeks, I feel I handled the situation firmly, but lovingly. I might have slipped up a little in October when Mr. Johnson from next door backed into our mailbox FOR THE FIFTH TIME.

You know, it’d be a lot easier to be nice throughout the year if I had a little bit of time to relax. If that Santaday thing proves too difficult, I’d gladly settle for a self-cleaning house. Or a gift certificate to Green Home Cleaning. I heard they are very professional and detail-oriented cleaners, AND they use environmentally friendly cleaning products, so we can both feel good about our decision. What do you say, big guy?


A Busy Mom

P.S. To get a Green Home Cleaning gift certificate, all you have to do is call 828.505.7320 or send them an email. I don't know what kind of international calling plans you have up there in the North Pole. I'd probably go with email.

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